Misuse of "patients" for "patience"

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It's usually pretty funny, albeit unintentionally, when someone misuses patients when they mean patience. The former, patients, is plural of patient, as in a person who is in the hospital because they're sick, whereas the latter, patience, has to do with the virtue of being a patient person. Here are some examples of correct usage:

"My patience has worn thin with my neighbor who hoards trash."
"Patience is a virtue!"
"You're very patient to wait for Alex to pay back the money he borrowed."

"How many patients are on the sixth floor of the hospital?"
"I love treating my patients every day at my practice."
"Patients are unpredictable at times."

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Misuse of "formally" for "formerly"

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Every time I see this particular pet peeve of mine, I wonder what the person is thinking...er, wait, clearly they're NOT thinking! If they were, they'd realize that they're using the wrong word. Here's an example:

"This store was formally known as Garden World."

If it was formally known as Garden World, I can't help but wonder what it was informally known as!

The word they're looking for is formerly, as in a former condition, not a formal one:

"This store was formerly known as Garden World."

Now I feel better. :)


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Misuse of "who's" for "whose"

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This is another case of words that sound alike, yet have completely different meanings and are not interchangeable: who's and whose.

Who's is a  contraction meaning who is, while whose means belonging to who(m). But, just like it's being misused for its, it's very common to see who's misused for whose.

These are INCORRECT:

"Do you know who's house that is?"
"Who's phone is ringing?
"That is who's book I borrowed."

Think about what those sentences are actually saying by expanding out the contraction who's:

"Do you know who is house that is?"
"Who is phone is ringing?"
"That is who is book I borrowed."

Pretty nonsensical, right? Now the correct versions:

"Do you know whose house that is?"
"Whose phone is ringing?"
"That is whose book I borrowed."

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Misuse of "except" for "accept"

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During a segment on a local newscast when I was living in Dallas, there was a sign behind the counter at a store. Its message: "Checks not excepted." Okay, then! What the hell does that mean?! Oh, I know! The clueless owner doesn't know the difference between accept and except.

Here are some examples of the two words used correctly:

"I can't accept the fact that she's only 30."
"Will you accept my invitation?"
"Please accept my condolences on the loss of your mother."
"Checks not accepted."

"She likes all colors except red."
"Except for Monday, weekdays aren't that bad."
"That's an exception to the rule."

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Misuse of "there" for "their" or "they're"

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The misuse of there for their or they're has reached epidemic proportions! Since these words are so commonly misused, here's how to tell them apart:

There refers to a place, as in "I'm going there tomorrow."

Their means "belonging to them," as in "Their house is on the corner."

They're is a contraction of they are, as in "They're going to the library."

These words are not interchangeable! Each one has a distinct meaning. Here are some examples:

- there
when did you get there?
please put the book over there on the coffee table
there used to be a school here

- their
when did you get their birthday present?
please put their book on the coffee table
their school used to be on that corner

- they're
when they're ready to leave, they'll call us
they're working on a new book
they're reminiscing about the old school

All three in one sentence:
"They're going to be there tomorrow for their father's birthday party."

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Incorrect use of "it's" for "its"

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I have no idea when this phenomenon started, but it became glaringly obvious after the masses started using the Internet: it's misused for its.

For example: "The book is in it's place on the shelf." UGH!!

See, here's the thing: it's is a contraction of it is--which means that, in the example above, the person is actually saying, "The book is in it is place on the shelf"...which makes NO SENSE whatsoever.

The word they're looking for is its--which means "belonging to it." The sentence should read, "The book is in its place on the shelf."

Think of it just like the words "his" and "hers"--neither of which has an apostrophe in it. (Although I frequently see "hers" misspelled as "her's"...and I don't know why they do that, either!)

His, hers, its. Belonging to him, belonging to her, belonging to it. Simple. NO APOSTROPHES.

Some examples:

"Let me know when it's time to go home."
"It's okay with me if you come over tomorrow."
"It's supposed to rain today.

"Put the book back in its place on the shelf."
"After the test, the teacher will post its answers on the board."
"My car needs its smog test this month."

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